Famous Woody Allen Quotes


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Woody Allen

Woody Allen

Woody Allen (born Allan Stewart KonigsbergDecember 1, 1935) is an American screenwriter, director, actor, comedian, author, playwright, and musician whose career spans over 50 years.

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.
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Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
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I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.
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The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.
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My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.
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I failed to make the chess team because of my height.
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If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.
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I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
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If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
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If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
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