Forgiveness is a funny thing. It warms the heart and cools the sting. Use this quote
A stockbroker urged me to buy a stock that would triple its value every year. I told him, "At my age, I don't even buy green bananas." Use this quote
If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library? Use this quote
I'm a person who likes these sort of movies... sad but moving 'art movies' that normally are at a festival and then they go to a small art house theater and disappear. Use this quote
We all wish we could be in more than one place at the same time. People with families feel guilty all the time-if we spend too much time with our family, we feel we're not working hard enough. Use this quote
I think a lot comes from having the experience of doing stand-up comedy. It allows you to figure out the psychology of an audience; what things are funny and not. Use this quote
Danny and I worked really hard in the beginning of the relationship to find different levels of this couple. Use this quote
Food is an important part of a balanced diet. Use this quote
I felt I had to share Idaho with my friend from New York because he'd shared New York with me, so I was going to share the beauty of nature with a man who went to museums and clubs late at night. But there was nothing to do where I lived at night. Use this quote
Things can be funny only when we are in fun. When we're 'dead earnest,' humor is the only thing that is dead. Use this quote
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. Use this quote
I got pregnant at 40 by surprise. It's funny, because when we found out we were pregnant, I said, 'Okay, let's experience that.' You just have to just go with it because it's rare. Use this quote
The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated. Use this quote
Among those whom I like or admire, I can find no common denominator, but among those whom I love, I can: all of them make me laugh. Use this quote
When Jesus comes back, these crazy, greedy, capitalistic men are gonna kill him again. Use this quote
Screaming at children over their grades, especially to the point of the child's tears, is child abuse, pure and simple. It's not funny and it's not good parenting. It is a crushing, scarring, disastrous experience for the child. It isn't the least bit funny. Use this quote
Try to realize it's all within yourself no one else can make you change, and to see you're only very small and life flows on within you and without you. Use this quote
Everything I buy is vintage and smells funny. Maybe that's why I don't have a boyfriend. Use this quote
You can't do anything to be funny. That's cringeworthy. If your humor comes out of a place of love every time, you don't make the joke bigger than you. The funniest comedians are in touch with their emotional level. Use this quote
Being in 'Us Weekly' does not make you famous. Use this quote