Famous Dennis Miller Quotes

I didn't know my Dad - he moved out early. And my mom's politics were kind of hardscrabble. She didn't think about Democrats or Republicans. She thought about who made sense. I've been both in my life.
Use this quote  

The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country.
Use this quote  

You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the 3 R's only one begins with an R.
Use this quote  

The American education system couldn't be more badly directed or poorly funded if the Secretary of Education were Ed Wood.
Use this quote  

There's nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you're insightful about it.
Use this quote  

I rant, therefore I am.
Use this quote  

Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch.
Use this quote  

Never ever discount the idea of marriage. Sure, someone might tell you that marriage is just a piece of paper. Well, so is money, and what's more life-affirming than cold, hard cash?
Use this quote  

Just put down 9/11... I think, on most things I'm liberal, except on defending ourselves and keeping half the money. Those things I'm kind of conservative on.
Use this quote  

I had fun pretending to be a sportscaster. People always think that was a down thing for me. I had the best job in sports broadcasting for two years.
Use this quote